They have no idea

It's All Crazy!

It’s all dark, they have no idea

It's all crazy, they don't know the struggles

For tears fall freely

Even as the hurt sinks deep!

When I wrote this quote months ago, I did it without realizing so much about how people can misjudge appearances for happiness and joy. I knew that most people functioned based on the connotations that flow from assumption, but I didn't really think too deeply about how sometimes most people interpret our physical appearance to mean that we have no struggles.

Sometime in December 2021, I got a real-time message from an acquaintance asking me to write a short business profile for his company, I was in a poor state as I had some health issues, which I had been dealing with and wouldn't permit me to work fully, I decided to stick with the monthly companies I was attached to that could understand the delay in projects. So, I had not been taking jobs frequently, sometimes I would outsource to members of my team who could do it but wouldn't if they had their hands full already, but I kept showing up online, and kept my spirit living and motivated. Then fast-forward to this day, I kindly and most appropriately told him to please get someone else to do the job, that it wasn't a good time for me, because of some health issues and hopefully believed that he understood.

Waking up to go through some WhatsApp status updates, I could see him indirectly calling me out, that sometimes pride goes beyond the fall. I laughed because it was really funny, a second post said that some people forget who was there for them at the beginning of their career, pretending to be busy, and all the other things that I just ignored altogether.

Maybe he wasn't referring to me, but it felt awkward when he started ignoring my follow-up message if he eventually got it done, when he later replied, he stated that "I am obviously too busy to do a job for him" so I wondered that when someone tells you that they are not capable health wise, what else do they need to say.  I sincerely had no strength for a confrontation because anyone who knows me understands that I run from it. However, I was quite taken aback because of this nastiness and pettiness, this tout behavior and mannerless attitude, lack of respect, and insensitivity. I said my piece to him and closed the chapter.

Sometimes, people may judge you for not being there or not even showing clearly what you are going through, but how many people use a trumpet to sing songs of their everyday troubles? Some do now though!

It is easy for people to see what's on the surface, they see you looking good, and they think you recently hit a jackpot, they see you lost weight, and they think you lost your job; they see you showing up every day, and they ultimately conclude that all is beautifully well and you have no troubles. They see you smile but forget that there might be underlining pain or hurt. That you may be healing from physical pain or emotional distraught but chose to show up, to keep pushing. Yet they expect the world from you.

I guess it is a normal phenomenon for human beings no matter how accomplished in life to go through difficulties every now and then, so why do people think that someone's life can be so perfect, without troubles and problems.

People are going through difficulties every day in the life, you may also be going through a lot right now, so I think it’s pretty unfair for anyone to judge your feelings, or what you are going through based on your countenance.

Dear friend, I know it can be crazy when people level these sorts of assumptions of how you feel or what you are feeling, I know firsthand how it feels to be in this shoe, where people are insensitive with their words based on what they see or perceive. However, I want you to understand that it's typical human nature, and you can overcome it by shutting it away, whatever doesn’t give you peace does not deserve your attention.

I have been through situations in life where people would never have guessed that I had a heavy load on my shoulders, shifting me from side to side, and whoever thought wrongly or assumed wrongly wasn’t my fault because I really can’t start announcing every single challenge I deal with daily.

So, in this letter, my aim is to let you know that I am fully aware that these things occur and that they can get on your nerves, but don't let them steal your peace.

People can assume all they want, but sometimes let them carry on with what they think your life revolves around. Let them judge the book without opening it, let them determine how emotionally and physically strong you are and let them be led by the little gods of assumption.

In the end, it's all about what you perceive of yourself, it's about the truth, and they certainly know it not.

They simply have no idea what you are going through, and it's all crazy that they go on thinking, assuming, and making silly remarks. But keep showing up and never give anyone the chance to break your soul.

I truly hope that you could relate to this letter, it has been ringing in my soul for some time now, and I just thought to share it here in our little corner. Keep the energy going, like, comment, and share this letter.

As always, I am constantly rooting for you.

Warm Regards

Amanda Sibi.